A 4th of July We’ll Never Forget

“Craig stealing my thunder…”

So what an insane weekend. Friday was 4th of July. I got to stay home. Me, Craig, and Dave went to Surf Stock to see Dave Attell. All we saw were shitty bands and lots of fake titties. MMMMMMMM. While sitting eatting a piece of pizza this guy came up to us from the Asbury Park Press and interviewed us. He asked us a bunch of questions to which Dave and I answered. Then he asked us why we came and Craig said the quote you see before you. He got all the press even though Dave and I did all the work. What a douche bag. After that Danielle called me and said she was at her Aunt’s in Brick so I picked her up and went to Kristen Davey’s house for a party. And in the words of Forrest Gump, “Thats all I have to say about that…”

Saturday Me, Skanko, 1985, and 1985’s girlfriend and her two friends went to Surf Taco. It was Taco-lishious. Upon arriving back at my house Skanko and I learned I had no power and did not have power since 3 PM. Me, Skanko, Firehouse, and Turbo went swimming. It was swim-ilishious. After that we BBQed. It was BBQ-lishious. Turbo and I made Teriyaki burgers and they were to die for. We ate all night into the wee hours of the morning only lit on my deck by candles and torches because I still did not have power. After that I flew the coup to the Ullman’s for some non-Amish living for a few hours. Then I left around midnightish and went to bed only to be awoken by various alarms in my house going off at 3 AM when the power came back on. FABULOUS! 12 hours with out power and alarms waking me up!

Yesterday we went to the mall and fitted ourselves for our aviators we are getting. Then Skanko and I hit up the boardwalk with Mr. Greg Coleman, Mr. Jon Sanzaro, and Bill the Native American. It was a fun time until I heard the most disparreging story…After that I won 3 Alf dolls out of the Skill cane. One for Me, Coleman, and some lady who paid me. I AM THE SKILL CRANE MASTER!

I am not motivated enough to write more. You will hear from me later this week…