Astrology with the Celebrities (Hetero Edition)

I can Thug too...
In our modern day of being obsessed with Hollywood and the celebrities that live in its world. It is not uncommon for us to picture ourselves with some of those celebrities. In my youth I wondered what it would be like to be in a relationship with Ginger Spice of the Spice Girls. Today I’ve moved on to bigger and better stars like Rosamund Pike and Monica Bellucci. Today I stumbled across a link that informs you of your compatibility with many of today’s hottest stars based on your astrological sign here is what I found out:

Beyonce Knowles
Beyonce Knowles
Love Meter: Call the Firehouse
This smarty-pants has got your number! Few can hold your voracious physical and mental appetite like she can. You make love with your body and mind, with a desire to penetrate to the heart of the matter; she has the mental fortitude. Your appetites can be your downfall; she starts a captivating conversation about the health benefits of juicing while her body language suggests there’s more to explore. How alluring for you.

Hilary Duff
Hilary Duff
Love Meter: Just Friends
Admit it, you’re an intensity junkie. She likes drama in relationships – to a degree – as a courtship ritual. When you continually give knock down, drag out performances, her peace loving ways just go through the motions. Her superficial responses leave you wanting more, and your demands drive her further away. You know you’re a lone wolf, and with her, you feel it. Keep the drama on the stage.

Jennifer Connelly
Jennifer Connelly
Love Meter: Warm Fuzzies
Initially, your magnetic sexuality attracts her. Until she senses that you want to possess her mind, body, and soul. It looks good on the surface: she is delightfully optimistic and fun, a breath of fresh air for your brooding emotional intensity; you both share a passion living life with gusto. But you’re craving a depth and bonding she’s unable to appreciate. A satisfying one night stand.

Jessica Biel
Jessica Biel
Love Meter:Call the Firehouse
You two should be attached at the hip. Your love comes with strings attached, which is just great for her. Her insecurity, her desire to be dominated are complemented by your powerful, often controlling personality. She is ravished, adored, and thrilled with your steamy sensuality and her devoted adoration quells your possessive streak. With her, you take journeys of the mind, body, and spirit. This tasty love morsel both mystifies and tantalizes.

Kelly Clarkson
Kelly Clarkson
Love Meter: Hot Tamales!!
Opposites attract! She is cute to your sexy, sweet to your bitter, stable earth for your torrential downpours. You keep her on her toes – trying to figure out your next move is a challenge. She sees herself as simple, but your rivers run deep. Your physical magnetism takes her to mysteries she’s never been before; she is your rock, the safe harbor you seek. Watch your jealousy, you’re a born flirt and she is possessively loyal!

Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Love Meter:Call the Firehouse
This hot couple has the run of the house. She is your steamy partner in crime, a love-junkie looking for her daily fix of you! Your rivers run deep, you live with an intensity that she understands. You feel your intuitive connection; her need for security and bonding reassures your jealous nature. You both crave a full-hearted love affair, and this promise is delivered with a sexy kiss.

Scarlett Johansson
Scarlett Johansson
Love Meter: Warm Fuzzies
Initially, your magnetic sexuality attracts her. Until she senses that you want to possess her mind, body, and soul. It looks good on the surface: she is delightfully optimistic and fun, a breath of fresh air for your brooding emotional intensity; you both share a passion living life with gusto. But you’re craving a depth and bonding she’s unable to appreciate. A satisfying one night stand.

So there you go. Maybe one day you’ll see these celebrity women on my arm when I become ruler of the world…

Next time we’re gonna get pretty gay…

Till next time… “::WHIRRRRRR::”

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